Editing Effie Gray

{{Short description|Scottish artists' model and wife (1828–1897)}}
{{Expand Italian|Effie Gray|fa=yes|topic=bio|date=February 2022}}
{{For|the 2014 biographical film|Effie Gray (film)}}
{{Use dmy dates|date=September 2019}}
{{Use British English|date=June 2012}}
{{Infobox writer <!-- for more information see [[:Template:Infobox writer/doc]] -->
| name          = Effie Gray
| birth_name    = Euphemia Chalmers Gray
| image         = Euphemia ('Effie') Chalmers (née Gray), Lady Millais by Thomas Richmond.jpg
| caption       = Gray portrait, 1851 (she thought the portrait made her look like "a graceful doll")<ref>{{Cite web|url=https://www.npg.org.uk/collections/search/portrait/mw04406/Effie-Gray-Lady-Millais|title=Effie Gray (Lady Millais) – National Portrait Gallery|website=Npg.org.uk|access-date=1 November 2021}}</ref>
| birth_date    = {{Birth date|1828|5|7|df=yes}}
| birth_place   = [[Perth, Scotland]]
| death_date    = {{death date and age|1897|12|23|1828|5|7|df=yes}}
| death_place   = Perth, Scotland
| occupation    = Author, artist
| education     =
| alma_mater    =
| period        = [[Victorian era]]
| years_active  =
| spouse        = {{Plainlist|
* {{marriage|[[John Ruskin]]|1848|1854|end=annulled}}
* {{marriage |[[John Everett Millais|Sir John Everett Millais, 1st Baronet]]|1855|1896|end=died}}
| children      = 8, including [[John Guille Millais]]
| signature     =
| signature_alt =
| module        =
|relatives= [[Sophie Gray]] (younger sister)
}}
}}

'''Euphemia Chalmers Millais, Lady Millais''' (''née'' '''Gray'''; 7 May 1828 – 23 December 1897) was a Scottish artists' model and writer who was married to [[Pre-Raphaelite Brotherhood|Pre-Raphaelite]] painter [[John Everett Millais]]. She had previously married the art critic [[John Ruskin]], but she left him with the marriage never having been [[consummated]]; it was subsequently [[annulment|annulled]]. This famous Victorian "[[love triangle]]" has been dramatised in plays, films, and an opera.

== Early life ==
Euphemia Chalmers Gray was born on 7 May 1828 in [[Perth, Scotland|Perth]], Perthshire, Scotland to lawyer and businessman George Gray (1798–1877) and Sophia Margaret (1808–1894), daughter of Andrew Jameson, [[Sheriff-substitute]] of [[Fife]].<ref name="Mervyn Williams 2012 Effie">Mervyn Williams (2012) ''Effie''</ref> She grew up at [[Bowerswell]], an [[Italianate architecture|Italianate-style]] house near the foot of [[Kinnoull Hill]].<ref name="Mervyn Williams 2012 Effie"/><ref>{{cite web|url=http://www.doorsopendays.org.uk/media/3401/pk-doors-open-days-2017-programme_final.pdf |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20220322031942/http://www.doorsopendays.org.uk/media/3401/pk-doors-open-days-2017-programme_final.pdf |archive-date=2022-03-22 |url-status=live|title=Doors Open Days: 2017 Programme|website=Doorsopendays.org.uk|access-date=1 November 2021}}</ref> Though she was given the pet-name "Phemy" by her parents as a child, she started to be known as "Effie" by the time she was a teenager.<ref>{{Cite book|last=Fagence Cooper|first=Suzanne|title=Effie: The Passionate Lives of Effie Gray, John Ruskin and John Everett Millais|publisher=St. Martin's Publishing Group|year=2011|isbn=978-1429962384|pages=12}}</ref> Her sisters [[Sophie Gray|Sophie]] and Alice often modelled for [[John Everett Millais]].

Between 1842 and 1844 she attended Avonbank school run by the [[Maria Byerley|Misses Byerley]] near Stratford on Avon, Warwickshire, England, partly as her parents wanted her to lose her Scottish accent. She was an assiduous student at Avonbank winning prizes in every year but was taken out of school to be a support to her mother when her siblings died of scarlet fever.<ref>{{Cite book|last=Randall|first=Linda|url=https://books.google.com/books?id=rj-1MQEACAAJ|title=Effie Gray: Fair Maid of Perth|date=2012|pages=291|isbn=978-1908645098|publisher=Melrose Books|language=en}}</ref>

== Relationship with John Ruskin ==
John Ruskin wrote the fantasy story ''[[The King of the Golden River]]'' for Gray in 1841, when she was 12 and he was 21. Gray's family knew Ruskin's father and encouraged a match between the two when she had matured. After an initially unsteady courtship, she married Ruskin on 10 April 1848; she was 19 years old.<ref name=":0">{{Cite book|title=Pre-Raphaelite Girl Gang|last=Walker|first=Kirsty Stonell|publisher=Unicorn|year=2018|pages=20}}</ref><ref>{{cite book|title=The Order of Release: The Story of John Ruskin, Effie Gray and John Everett Millais Told for the First Time in their Unpublished Letters|year=1948|publisher=J. Murray|location=University of Michigan|url=https://books.google.com/books?id=jU4RAAAAMAAJ&q=ruskin+gray+marriage|editor=James, William Milbourne|page=1}}</ref> During their honeymoon, they travelled to [[Venice]], where Ruskin was doing research for his book ''[[The Stones of Venice (book)|The Stones of Venice]]''. While in Perth, Scotland, they lived at Bowerswell, the Gray family home, and site of their wedding. It had, coincidentally, previously been the home of Ruskin's paternal grandparents. In 1817, Ruskin's mother, Margaret, during her engagement to Ruskin's father, had stayed at Bowerswell and was witness to three tragic deaths within its walls in quick succession (Ruskin's grandmother, grandfather, and newborn cousin). This caused her to develop a severe phobia concerning Bowerswell, keeping her from attending her son's wedding to Gray.<ref name="Garnett2012">{{cite book|author=Henrietta Garnett|title=Wives and Stunners: The Pre-Raphaelites and Their Muses|url=https://books.google.com/books?id=xshaKqrZClAC&pg=PP227|date=30 August 2012|publisher=Pan Macmillan|isbn=978-0-230-76754-6|pages=227–etc}}</ref><ref>{{Cite book|last=Fagence Cooper|first=Suzanne|title=Effie: The Passionate Lives of Effie Gray, John Ruskin and John Everett Millais|publisher=St. Martin's Publishing Group|year=2011|isbn=978-1429962384|pages=19–21}}</ref>

Gray and Ruskin's different personalities were thrown into sharp relief by their contrasting priorities. For Gray, Venice provided an opportunity to socialise while Ruskin was engaged in solitary studies. In particular, he made a point of drawing the [[Ca' d'Oro]] and the [[Doge's Palace, Venice|Palazzo Ducale]] (Doge's Palace), because he feared they would soon be destroyed by the occupying Austrian troops. One of the troops, Lieutenant Charles Paulizza, made friends with Gray, apparently with no objection from Ruskin. Her brother, among others, later said that Ruskin was deliberately encouraging the friendship in order to compromise her, as an excuse to separate.

When she met [[John Everett Millais]] five years later, Gray was still a virgin. Ruskin had persistently put off [[consummate|consummating]] the marriage. Gray and Ruskin had agreed upon abstaining from sex for five years to allow Ruskin to focus on his studies.<ref name=":0" /> Another reason involved his apparent disgust with some aspect of her body. As she later wrote to her father:

<blockquote>He alleged various reasons, hatred to children, religious motives, a desire to preserve my beauty, and, finally this last year he told me his true reason...  that he had imagined women were quite different to what he saw I was, and that the reason he did not make me his Wife was because he was disgusted with my person the first evening.<ref name="Hewison1979">{{cite book|author=Robert Hewison|title=John Ruskin|url=https://books.google.com/books?id=1XjntfarTykC&pg=PA201|year=1979|publisher=Ardent Media|pages=201–202|id=GGKEY:8PSQ7NGSATA}}</ref></blockquote>

Ruskin confirmed this in his statement to his lawyer during the [[annulment]] proceedings: "It may be thought strange that I could abstain from a woman who to most people was so attractive. But though her face was beautiful, her person was not formed to excite passion. On the contrary, there were certain circumstances in her person which completely checked it."<ref>Lutyens, M., ''Millais and the Ruskins'', p.191</ref> The reason for Ruskin's disgust with "circumstances in her person" is unknown. Various suggestions have been made, including revulsion at either her pubic hair<ref>Phyllis Rose (1983) ''Parallel Lives''</ref><ref>Franny Moyle (2009) ''Desperate Romantics''</ref> or menstrual blood.<ref>Peter Fuller, ''Theoria: Art and the Absence of Grace'', Chatto & Windus, 1988, pp.11–12</ref><ref>[[Suzanne Fagence Cooper]] (2010) ''The Model Wife: The Passionate Lives of Effie Gray, Ruskin and Millais''.</ref> Robert Brownell, on the contrary, in his analysis ''Marriage of Inconvenience'', argues that Ruskin's difficulty with the marriage was financial and related to concerns that Gray and her less affluent family were trying to tap into Ruskin's considerable wealth.<ref>{{cite journal |url=https://www.theguardian.com/books/2013/mar/29/ruskin-effie-marriage-inconvenience-brownell |first=Michael |last=Prodger |date=29 March 2013 |access-date=24 March 2015 |title=John Ruskin's marriage: What really happened |journal=Guardian}}</ref>

== Relationship with John Everett Millais ==

[[File:Millais Waterfall 1935-53.jpg|thumb|''Waterfall'', or ''Effie at Glenfinlas'', 1853, by Millais]]
While married to Ruskin, Gray modelled for Millais' painting ''[[The Order of Release]]'', in which she was depicted as the loyal wife of a Scottish rebel who has secured his release from prison. She then became close to Millais when he accompanied the couple on a trip to Scotland in order to paint Ruskin's portrait according to the critic's artistic principles. During this time, spent in [[Brig o' Turk]] in the [[Trossachs]], they fell in love. While working on the portrait of her husband, Millais made many drawings and sketches of Gray. He also sent humorous cartoons of himself, Gray and Ruskin to friends. She copied some of his works.

After their return to London, Gray left Ruskin, ostensibly to visit her family. She sent back her wedding ring with a note announcing her intention to file for an [[annulment]]. With the support of her family and influential friends, she pursued the case, causing a public scandal. Their marriage was annulled on the grounds of "incurable [[impotency]]" in 1854.<ref>National Records of Scotland, Annulment recorded in Kinnoull Kirk Session Minutes (NRS ref. CH2/948/7), 1854, pp.223–227.</ref>

== Marriage to John Everett Millais ==
[[File:Gray millais 1865.jpg|thumbnail|Albumen print photograph by [[Lewis Carroll]] from 21 July 1865 depicting Effie Gray, [[John Everett Millais]], and their daughters Effie and Mary at 7 Cromwell Place, signed "Effie C. Millais"]]
In 1855, she married John Millais and they had eight children together: Everett, born in 1856; George, born in 1857; Effie, born in 1858; Mary, born in 1860; Alice, born in 1862; Geoffrey, born in 1863; John in 1865; and Sophie in 1868. Their youngest son, [[John Guille Millais]], became a notable bird artist and gardener. Gray also modelled for a number of her husband's works, notably ''[[Peace Concluded]]'' (1856), which idealises her as an icon of beauty and fertility. In 1885, her husband was elevated to the [[baronetage]] by [[Queen Victoria]], having been created [[Millais baronets|Baronet Millais]] of Palace Gate, in the parish of [[St Mary Abbots|St Mary Abbot]], [[Kensington]], in the county of [[Middlesex]], and of [[Saint Ouen, Jersey|Saint Ouen]], in the Island of [[Jersey]].<ref name= londongazette>{{London Gazette |issue=25490 |date=14 July 1885 |page=3239 }}</ref> Upon her husband's elevation, Effie became entitled to use the style [[Lady#British titles|Lady]] Millais.<ref name= londongazette/>

=== Ruskin's rapport with Rose La Touche ===

In 1858, Ruskin met [[Rose La Touche]]; at the time she was 10 years old, and he became her teacher in drawing as well as other subjects.<ref>{{Cite book |last=Ruskin |first=John |chapter-url=https://archive.org/details/worksofjohnruski35rusk/page/n77/mode/2up |title=The works of John Ruskin |publisher=London: George Allen; New York: Longmans, Green, and Co. |year=1909 |editor-last=Cook |editor-first=Edward Tyas |editor-link=Edward Tyas Cook |volume=35 |pages=lxvi–lxvii |language=English |chapter=Introduction |oclc=1097357632 |editor-last2=Wedderburn |editor-first2=Alexander Dundas Ogilvy}}</ref> Ruskin became attracted to La Touche and when she turned 18 sought to become engaged. Rose's parents were concerned and wrote to Gray, asking for her opinion of Ruskin as a husband. Her reply described him as "oppressive".<ref>This detail needs to be researched. See Gregory Murphy's Letter to the Editor in the New York Times, June 2000 (next citation). Murphy says the first letter went to Mr. Millais, and it was a second letter that went to Effie. This same source mentions the actual letters are in the [https://www.themorgan.org/search/site/Bowerswell%20Papers Bowerswell Papers] at the Morgan Library in New York. But quick research didn’t find the actual letters to confirm with Murphy wrote.</ref> The engagement was broken off.<ref>{{Cite news |last=Murphy |first=Gregory |date=2000-06-04 |title=Ruskin's Misogyny |language=en-US |work=The New York Times |url=https://www.nytimes.com/2000/06/04/books/l-ruskin-s-misogyny-440728.html |access-date=2021-08-16 |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20160308121654/http://www.nytimes.com/2000/06/04/books/l-ruskin-s-misogyny-440728.html |archive-date=2016-03-08 |issn=0362-4331}}</ref><ref>{{Cite news |last=Prodger |first=Michael |date=29 March 2013 |title=John Ruskin's marriage: what really happened |work=[[The Guardian]] |url=https://www.theguardian.com/books/2013/mar/29/ruskin-effie-marriage-inconvenience-brownell |access-date=20 December 2016 |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20210608062943/https://www.theguardian.com/books/2013/mar/29/ruskin-effie-marriage-inconvenience-brownell |archive-date=2021-06-08}}</ref>

=== Influence on Millais ===
[[File:EFFIE.jpg|thumb|200px|Gray in middle age, painted by Millais. She is holding a copy of ''[[The Cornhill Magazine]]''.]]
Gray was an effective manager of Millais' career and often collaborated with him in choosing his subjects. Her journal indicates her high regard for her husband's art, and his works are still recognisably Pre-Raphaelite in style several years after his marriage.

However, Millais eventually abandoned the Pre-Raphaelite obsession with detail and began to paint in a looser style which produced more paintings for the time and effort. Many paintings were inspired by his family life with his wife, often using his children and grandchildren as models. Millais also used his sister-in-law, [[Sophie Gray]], then in her early teens, as the basis of some striking images in the mid to late 1850s, provoking suggestions of a mutual infatuation.<ref name=Cooper>Suzanne Fagence Cooper (2010) ''The Model Wife: The Passionate Lives of Effie Gray, Ruskin and Millais''</ref>

== Later life and death ==
[[File:Euphemia Millais Gray.jpg|thumb|Effie's grave marker, which is shared with her son, George Gray Millais, in Perth, Scotland]]
Gray had been officially [[debutante|presented]] to [[Queen Victoria]] on 20 June 1850. This was arranged by Lady Davy, a friend and neighbour of hers from London who was also friends with one of the Queen's [[Ladies in waiting|ladies-in-waiting]].<ref>{{Cite book|last=Fagence Cooper|first=Suzanne|title=Effie: The Passionate Lives of Effie Gray, John Ruskin and John Everett Millais|publisher=[[St. Martin's Publishing Group]]|year=2011|isbn=978-1429962384|pages=69}}</ref> However, the [[annulment]] from Ruskin barred her from events at which the Queen was present. Her social status was affected negatively, although many in society were still prepared to receive her and to press her case sympathetically.<ref name=Cooper/> Eventually, when Millais was dying, the Queen relented through the intervention of her daughter [[Princess Louise, Duchess of Argyll|Princess Louise]], allowing Gray to attend an official function. 

Gray had an interest in local and family history, and corresponded with Perthshire historian [[Robert Scott Fittis]], author of Sketches of the Olden Times in Perthshire (1878), about the Gray family history.<ref>Letter from Lady Millais to RS Fittis dated 7 October 1889. MS2/1/bundle 13 (24). Held in Fittis Collection, Perth and Kinross Archives.</ref>  

Sixteen months after Millais' death in August 1896, Gray died at Bowerswell on 23 December 1897.<ref>{{cite book|url=https://books.google.com/books?id=mFKRlPTPTKkC&pg=PA251|title=The Order of Release – The Story of John Ruskin, Effie Gray and John Everett Millias|first=W.|last=James|isbn=978-1-4437-0293-5|publisher=Read|year=2008|page=251|access-date=27 February 2010}}</ref> She was buried beside her son George, who died aged 21,<ref name="og">[https://www.scottish-places.info/features/featurefirst10808.html ''Ordnance Gazetteer of Scotland: A Graphic and Accurate Description of Every Place in Scotland''], [[Francis Hindes Groome]] (1901)</ref> in [[Kinnoull Parish Church|Kinnoull Parish]] churchyard, Perth, which is depicted in Millais's painting ''The Vale of Rest''. Gray's father had donated the Millais window, the West window, to Kinnoull Church in 1870. It is based on designs drawn by Millais.<ref>"The Millais window" – ''[[The Courier (Dundee)|The Courier]]'', 22 April 2020.</ref>

Her letters have been published posthumously in ''Effie in Venice: Her Picture of Society Life with John Ruskin, 1849-52'' (1965) and ''The Order of Release: The Story of John Ruskin, Effie Gray and John Everett Millais Told for the First Time in their Unpublished Letters'' (1948).

== In drama and literature ==
Gray's marriage to Ruskin and subsequent romance with Millais have been dramatised on many occasions:
* ''The Love of John Ruskin'' (1912), a silent movie about Ruskin, Gray and Millais.
* ''[[The Love School]]'' (1975), a BBC series about the Pre-Raphaelites, starring [[Anne Kidd]] (Gray), [[David Collings]] (Ruskin), and [[Peter Egan]] (Millais).
* ''John Ruskin's Wife'' (1979), a novel about the relationship by Eva McDonald.
* ''Dear Countess'' (1983), a radio play by [[Elizabeth Morgan (actress)|Elizabeth Morgan]], with [[Derek Jacobi]] (Ruskin), Bridget McCann (Gray), [[Timothy West]] (Old Mr Ruskin) [[Michael Fenner]] (Millais). The author played Ruskin's mother.
* [[File:Effie Gray (Lady Millais) letter to RS Fittis.jpg|alt=Letter from Lady Millais (Effie Gray) to RS Fittis dated 7 October 1889 in which she purchases his books as prizes for Birnam schoolchildren and expresses an interest in exploring her Gray family history.|thumb|Letter from Lady Millais (Effie Gray) to RS Fittis dated 7 October 1889.  Held in Fittis Collection, Perth and Kinross Archives.]]''[[The Passion of John Ruskin]]'' (1994), a short film directed by [[Alex Chappel]], starring [[Mark McKinney]] (Ruskin), [[Neve Campbell]] (Gray) and [[Colette Stevenson]] (Gray's voice).
* ''Modern Painters'' (1995), an opera about Ruskin, Gray and Millais, music by David Lang, libretto by Manuela Hoelterhoff.
* ''Parrots and Owls'', (1994) a radio play by [[John Purser (musician)|John Purser]] about the [[O'Shea brothers]] in which Gray appears as a friend of James O'Shea and her marital problems are discussed.
* ''[[The Countess (play)|The Countess]]'' (1995), a play written by [[Gregory Murphy]] concentrating on the breakdown of the marriage between Ruskin and Gray.
* ''The Order of Release'' (1998), a radio play by [[Robin Brooks]] about Ruskin ([[Bob Peck]]), Gray ([[Sharon Small]]) and Millais ([[David Tennant]]).
* ''The Woman Who Gave Birth to Rabbits'' (2002), a collection of short stories by [[Emma Donoghue]], contains a story "Come, Gentle Night" about Ruskin and Gray's wedding night.
* ''Mrs Ruskin'' (2003), a play by [[Kim Morrissey]] about the breakdown of the marriage and Gray's fraught relationship with Ruskin's domineering mother.
* ''[[Desperate Romantics]]'' (2009), a six-part [[BBC]] television drama serial about the Pre-Raphaelite Brotherhood. She is played by [[Zoe Tapper]].
* ''[[Effie Gray (film)|Effie Gray]]'' (2014), a film produced by [[Emma Thompson]] with [[Dakota Fanning]] as the eponymous character, [[Tom Sturridge]] as Millais and [[Greg Wise]] as Ruskin.<ref>{{Cite web|url=https://deadline.com/2011/08/dakota-fanning-and-emma-thompson-team-for-1850s-victorian-drama-effie-158691/|title=Dakota Fanning And Emma Thompson Team For 1850s Victorian Drama 'Effie'|first=Mike Jr.|last=Fleming|website=[[Deadline Hollywood]]|date=16 August 2011|access-date=1 November 2021}}</ref>

==References==
{{reflist}}

==External links==
{{Commons category}}
* {{NPG name|03082}}
* [http://www.preraphaelites.org Birmingham Museums & Art Gallery's Pre-Raphaelite Online Resource] {{Webarchive|url=https://web.archive.org/web/20090529144625/http://www.preraphaelites.org/ |date=29 May 2009 }}
* [http://preraphaelitesisterhood.com/what-is-the-pre-raphaelite-woman/ An overview of the women involved in the Pre-Raphaelite circle]

{{Pre-Raphaelite Brotherhood}}
{{John Everett Millais}}
{{John Ruskin}}
{{Authority control}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Gray, Effie}}
[[Category:1828 births]]
[[Category:1897 deaths]]
[[Category:British artists' models]]
[[Category:Millais family]]
[[Category:People from Perth, Scotland]]
[[Category:Pre-Raphaelite Brotherhood artists' models]]
[[Category:John Ruskin]]
[[Category:Scottish female models]]
[[Category:Wives of baronets]]
[[Category:Women of the Victorian era]]