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==Relationship satisfaction== {{merge from|Relationship quality|date=January 2025|section=TRUE}} Social exchange theory and Rusbult's investment model show that relationship satisfaction is based on three factors: rewards, costs, and comparison levels (Miller, 2012).<ref>{{cite book | vauthors = Miller R | year = 2012 | title = Attraction In Intimate Relationships | edition = 6th | pages = 71 | location = New York | publisher = Mc-Graw Hill }}</ref> Rewards refer to any aspects of the partner or relationship that are positive. Conversely, costs are the negative or unpleasant aspects of the partner or their relationship. The comparison level includes what each partner expects of the relationship. The comparison level is influenced by past relationships, and general relationship expectations they are taught by family and friends. Individuals in [[long-distance relationship]]s, LDRs, rated their relationships as more satisfying than individuals in proximal relationship, PRs.<ref name = "Stafford_1990">{{cite journal | vauthors = Stafford L, Reske J | year = 1990 | title = Idealization and communication in long-distance premarital relationships | journal = Family Relations | volume = 39 | issue = 3| pages = 274–279 | doi=10.2307/584871 | jstor = 584871 }}</ref><ref name = "Stafford_2005">{{cite book | vauthors = Stafford L | year = 2005 | title = Maintaining long-distance and cross residential relationships. | url = https://archive.org/details/maintaininglongd0000staf | url-access = registration | location = Mahwah, NJ | publisher = Lawrence Erlbaum Associates }}</ref> Alternatively, Holt and Stone (1988) found that long-distance couples who were able to meet with their partner at least once a month had similar satisfaction levels to unmarried couples who cohabitated.<ref name = "Holt_1998">{{cite journal | vauthors = Holt P, Stone G | year = 1988 | title = Needs, coping strategies, and coping outcomes associated with long-distance relationships | journal = Journal of College Student Development | volume = 29 | pages = 136–141 }}</ref> Also, the relationship satisfaction was lower for members of LDRs who saw their partner less frequently than once a month. LDR couples reported the same level of relationship satisfaction as couples in PRs, despite only seeing each other on average once every 23 days.<ref name = "Guldner_1995">{{cite journal | vauthors = Guldner GT, Swensen CH | year = 1995 | title = Time spent together and relationship quality: Long distance relationships as a test case | journal = Journal of Social and Personal Relationships | volume = 12 | issue = 2| pages = 313–320 | doi=10.1177/0265407595122010| s2cid = 145471401 }}</ref> Social exchange theory and the am investment model both theorize that relationships that are high in cost would be less satisfying than relationships that are low in cost. LDRs have a higher level of costs than PRs, therefore, one would assume that LDRs are less satisfying than PRs. Individuals in LDRs are more satisfied with their relationships compared to individuals in PRs.<ref name = "Stafford_2005" /> This can be explained by unique aspects of the LDRs, how the individuals use relationship maintenance behaviors, and the attachment styles of the individuals in the relationships. Therefore, the costs and benefits of the relationship are subjective to the individual, and people in LDRs tend to report lower costs and higher rewards in their relationship compared to PRs.<ref name = "Stafford_2005" /> ===Theories and empirical research=== ====Confucianism==== [[Confucianism#Relationships|Confucianism]] is a study and theory of relationships, especially within hierarchies.<ref>{{cite web |url= http://www.iep.utm.edu/confuciu/ |title=Confucius |publisher=Internet Encyclopedia of Philosophy |first=Jeff |last=Richey |work=iep.utm.edu |year=2011 |access-date=August 11, 2011}}</ref> Social harmony—the central goal of Confucianism—results in part from every individual knowing their place in the social order and playing their part well. Particular duties arise from each person's particular situation in relation to others. The individual stands simultaneously in several different relationships with different people: as a junior in relation to parents and elders; and as a senior in relation to younger siblings, students, and others. Juniors are considered in Confucianism to owe their seniors reverence and seniors have duties of benevolence and concern toward juniors. A focus on mutuality is prevalent in East Asian cultures to this day. ====Minding relationships==== The mindfulness theory of relationships shows how closeness in relationships may be enhanced. Minding is the "reciprocal knowing process involving the nonstop, interrelated thoughts, feelings, and behaviors of persons in a relationship."<ref>{{cite book | vauthors = Harvey JH, Pauwels BG | date = 2009 | chapter = Relationship Connection: A Redux on the Role of Minding and the Quality of Feeling Special | title = Enhancement of Closeness | veditors = Snyder CD, Lopez SJ | series = Oxford Handbook of Positive Psychology | edition = Second | location = Oxford | publisher = Oxford University Press | pages = 385–392 }}</ref> Five components of "minding" include:<ref name=snyder>{{cite book | vauthors = Snyder CR, Lopez SJ | date = 2007 | title = Positive psychology: the scientific and practical explorations of human strengths | url = https://archive.org/details/positivepsycholo00c | url-access = limited | location = Thousand Oaks, California | publisher = [[SAGE Publications]] | pages = [https://archive.org/details/positivepsycholo00c/page/n325 297]–321 | isbn = 9780761926337 }}</ref> # Knowing and being known: seeking to understand the partner # Making relationship-enhancing attributions for behaviors: giving the benefit of the doubt # Accepting and respecting: [[empathy]] and social skills # Maintaining reciprocity: active participation in relationship enhancement # Continuity in minding: persisting in mindfulness
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