Editing Christian views on marriage (section)

==Theological views==
Christians seek to uphold the seriousness of wedding vows. Yet, Protestants denominations and the Orthodox Church respond with compassion to deep hurts by recognizing that divorce, though less than the ideal, is sometimes necessary to relieve one partner of intolerable hardship, unfaithfulness or desertion.<ref name="Staggs">{{citation|last1=Stagg|first1=Evelyn|title=Woman in the World of Jesus|year=1978|place=Philadelphia|publisher=Westminster|isbn=0-664-24195-6|last2=Stagg|first2=Frank|author1-link=Evelyn Stagg|author2-link=Frank Stagg (theologian)|title-link=Woman in the World of Jesus}}</ref> While the voice of God had said, "I hate divorce",<ref>{{Bibleverse|Malachi|2:16}}</ref> some authorities believe the divorce rate in the church is nearly comparable to that of the culture at large.<ref name=Desai>Amy Desai, J.D. [http://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/divorce_and_infidelity/should_i_get_a_divorce/how_should_a_christian_view_marriage_and_divorce.aspx How Should a Christian View Marriage and Divorce?] Retrieved 15 Jan. 2018</ref> The Catholic Church official doctrine is that divorce is immoral with the exception of its use to protect one or more spouses with the understanding that civil divorce is not an actual divorce in the eyes of God. 

Christians today hold three competing views as to what is the biblically ordained relationship between husband and wife. These views range from [[Christian egalitarianism]] that interprets the New Testament as teaching complete equality of authority and responsibility between the man and woman in marriage, all the way to [[Patriarchy]] that calls for a "return to complete patriarchy" in which relationships are based on male-dominant power and authority in marriage:<ref name=Patriarchy/>

1. [[Christian egalitarianism|Christian Egalitarians]] believe in an equal partnership of the wife and husband with neither being designated as the leader in the marriage or family. Instead, the wife and husband share a fully equal partnership in both their marriage and in the family. Its proponents teach "the fundamental biblical principle of the equality of all human beings before God". This view emphasizes God made Man, male and female, in equal dignity as two modes of being in God’s image.

"There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus."<ref name="Bibleref2|Gal.|3:28">{{Bibleverse|Gal.|3:28}}</ref>

According to this principle, there can be no moral or theological justification for permanently granting or denying status, privilege, or prerogative solely on the basis of a person's race, class, or gender.<ref name="Groothuis">Groothuis, Rebecca M. "Sexuality, Spirituality and Feminist Religion". [http://www.cbeinternational.org/?q=content/sexuality-spirituality-and-feminist-religion] {{webarchive|url=https://web.archive.org/web/20130515014220/http://www.cbeinternational.org/?q=content%2Fsexuality-spirituality-and-feminist-religion|date=2013-05-15}} Retrieved 8 Mar 2013</ref> This proof text is typically used for the egalitarian view but misses the Greek text is addressing “you,” second person plural, so application to individuals is a common whole-part fallacy when reading Galatians.

2. [[Complementarianism|Christian Complementarians]] prescribe husband-headship—a male-led hierarchy. This view's core beliefs call for a husband's "loving, humble headship" and the wife's "intelligent, willing submission" to his headship. They believe women have "different but complementary roles and responsibilities in marriage".<ref name=Comp>Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood (CBMW). Core Beliefs. {{cite web |url=https://www.cbmw.org/core-beliefs/ |title=CBMW – the Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood |access-date=2013-03-06 |url-status=dead |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20130206132921/https://www.cbmw.org/core-beliefs/ |archive-date=2013-02-06 }} Retrieved 5 March 2013</ref> This view holds to Genesis 1 that men and women are made in equal dignity yet also emphasizes relational distinctions via St. Paul’s teaching that marriage signifies the unity between Christ and his bride the Church, which entails the man is to be like Christ and the woman is to be like the Church.

3. [[Biblical patriarchy]] prescribes a strict male-dominant hierarchy. A very strong view makes the husband the ruler over his wife and his household.<ref>[https://cbmw.org/uncategorized/summaries-of-the-egalitarian-and-complementarian-positions Summaries of the Egalitarian and Complementarian Positions] Retrieved January 18, 2018/</ref> Their organization's first tenet is that "God reveals Himself as masculine, not feminine. God is the eternal Father and the eternal Son, the Holy Spirit is also addressed as He, and Jesus Christ is a male". They consider the husband-father to be sovereign over his household—the family leader, provider, and protector. They call for a wife to be obedient to her head (her husband) as described in Ephesians 6.<ref name=Patriarchy>{{cite web |url = http://www.visionforumministries.org/home/about/biblical_patriarchy.aspx |title = "The Tenets of Biblical Patriarchy". Visual Forum Ministries |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20070626134919/http://www.visionforumministries.org/home/about/biblical_patriarchy.aspx |archive-date=26 June 2007 |url-status=dead}}</ref> One view of this perspective leads to a domination of head over body, male over female. If it is accompanied with equal revelation of the earth described as mother in Wisdom literature, the Church as a she (ecclesia), etc then a second version of this view is the patriarchal-matriarchal view which emphasizes equal dignity, asymmetrical complimentary, each aiming at virtue cultivation, but maintaining the essential head-body metaphor St Paul uses.

Some [[Polygamy in Christianity|Christian authorities permit the practice polygamy]] (specifically [[polygyny]]), but this practice, besides being illegal in Western cultures, is now considered to be out of the Christian mainstream in most parts of the globe; the [[Lutheran World Federation]] hosted a regional conference in Africa, in which the acceptance of polygamists and their wives into full membership by the Lutheran Church in Liberia was defended as being permissible.<ref>{{cite book |last=Deressa |first=Yonas |title=The Ministry of the Whole Person |year=1973 |publisher=Gudina Tumsa Foundation |language=en |page=350}}</ref> While the Lutheran Church in Liberia permits men to retain their wives if they married them prior to being received into the Church, it does not permit polygamists who have become Christians to marry more wives after they have received the [[sacrament]] of Holy Baptism.<ref name="KilbridePage2012">{{cite book |last1=Kilbride |first1=Philip Leroy |last2=Page |first2=Douglas R. |title=Plural Marriage for Our Times: A Reinvented Option? |year=2012 |publisher=ABC-CLIO |language=en |isbn=9780313384783 |page=188}}</ref>

===Family authority and responsibilities===

[[File:Pukirev ner brak.jpg|thumb|Orthodox betrothal depicted by [[Vasily Vladimirovich Pukirev]], 1862.]]

Much of the dispute hinges on how one interprets the [[New Testament household code]] ''(Haustafel)'', a term coined by [[Martin Luther]],  which has as its main focus hierarchical relationships between three pairs of social classes that were controlled by Roman law: husbands/wives, parents/children, and masters/slaves. The apostolic teachings, with variations, that constitute what has been termed the "household code" occurs in four epistles (letters) by the [[Apostle Paul]] and in 1&nbsp; Peter.

In the early [[Roman Republic]], long before the time of Christ, the law of ''[[Manus marriage|manus]]'' along with the concept of ''[[Pater familias|patria potestas]]'' (rule of the fathers), gave the husband nearly absolute autocratic power over his wife, children, and slaves, including the power of life and death. In practice, the extreme form of this right was seldom exercised, and it was eventually limited by law.<ref>{{cite book |last1=Severy |first1=Beth |title=Augustus and the Family at the Birth of the Roman Empire |date=2003 |publisher=Routledge |isbn=0-415-30959-X}}</ref>

[[Frank Stagg (theologian)|Theologian Frank Stagg]]<ref name=Stagg>Stagg, Frank. ''New Testament Theology''. Broadman Press, 1962. {{ISBN|0-8054-1613-7}}</ref>{{rp|pp.187ff}} finds the basic tenets of the code in [[Aristotle]]'s discussion of the household in Book&nbsp;1 of ''[[Politics (Aristotle)|Politics]]'' and in [[Philo]]'s ''Hypothetica 7.14''.<ref>{{cite web|quote=(7.14) Do not these objects appear to you to be of greater importance than any other pursuit can possibly be? Therefore they do not go to interpreters of laws to learn what they ought to do; and even without asking, they are in no ignorance respecting the laws, so as to be likely, through following their own inclinations, to do wrong; but if you violate or alter any one of the laws, or if you ask any one of them about their national laws or customs, they can all tell you at once, without any difficulty; and the husband appears to be a master, endowed with sufficient authority to explain these laws to his wife, a father to teach them to his children...
|author=Philo
|author-link=Philo
|title=Hypothetica/Apology for the Jews
|work=The Works of Philo
|url=http://www.earlychristianwritings.com/yonge/book37.html}}</ref> Serious study of the [[New Testament Household Code]] ''(Haustafel)'' began with Martin Dilbelius in 1913, with a wide range of studies since then. In a [[Tübingen]] dissertation,<ref>Crouch. James E. ''The Origin and Intention of the Colossian Haustafel.'' Gottingen: Vandenhoeck & Ruprecht, 1972.</ref> by James E. Crouch concludes that the early Christians found in Hellenistic Judaism a code which they adapted and Christianized.

The Staggs believe the several occurrences of the [[New Testament household code]] in the Bible were intended to meet the needs for ''order'' within the churches and in the society of the day. They maintain that the New Testament household code is an attempt by Paul and Peter to Christianize the concept of family relationships for Roman citizens who had become followers of Christ. The Staggs write that there is some suggestion in scripture that because Paul had taught that they had newly found freedom "in Christ", wives, children, and slaves were taking improper advantage of the ''Haustafel'' both in the home and the church. 
"The form of the code stressing reciprocal social duties is traced to Judaism's own Oriental background, with its strong moral/ethical demand but also with a low view of woman.... At bottom is probably to be seen the perennial tension between freedom and order.... What mattered to (Paul) was 'a new creation'<ref>{{Bibleverse|Gal.|6:15}}</ref> and 'in Christ' there is 'not any Jew not Greek, not any slave nor free, not any male and female'.<ref name="Bibleref2|Gal.|3:28"/><ref name=Staggs/>

Two of these Christianized codes are found in Ephesians 5 (which contains the phrases "husband is the head of the wife" and "wives, submit to your husband") and in Colossians 3, which instructs wives to subordinate themselves to their husbands.

The importance of the meaning of "head" as used by the [[Apostle Paul]] is pivotal in the conflict between the Complementarian position and the Egalitarian view. The word Paul used for "head", transliterated from Greek, is ''kephalē''. Today's English word "cephalic" ({{IPAc-en|s|ə|ˈ|f|æ|l|ᵻ|k}} {{Respell|sə|FAL|ik}}) stems from the Greek ''kephalē'' and means "of or relating to the head; or located on, in, or near the head." A thorough concordance search by [[Catherine Kroeger]] shows that the most frequent use of "head" ''(kephalē)'' in the New Testament is to refer to "the anatomical head of a body". She found that its second most frequent use in the New Testament was to convey the metaphorical sense of "source".<ref>Kroeger, Catherine Clark. "Toward an Understanding of Ancient Conceptions of 'Head'". ''Priscilla Papers,'' Volume 20:3, Summer 2006.</ref><ref>Johnson, Alan F. "A Meta-Study of the Debate over the Meaning of 'Head' (Kephale) in Paul's Writings. ''Priscilla Papers, '' Volume 20:4, Autumn 2006</ref> Other Egalitarian authors such as Margaret Howe agree with Kroeger, writing that "The word 'head'<ref>in {{Bibleverse|1cor|11:3||1&nbsp; Corinthians&nbsp;11:3}} and other similar passages</ref> must be understood not as 'ruler' but as 'source{{' "}}.<ref>Margaret Howe, Women and Church Leadership (Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 1982), p. 60.</ref>

Wayne Grudem criticizes commonly rendering ''kephalē'' in those same passages only to mean "source", and argues that it denotes "authoritative head" in such texts as Corinthians 11. They interpret that verse to mean that [[God the Father]] is the authoritative head over the [[God the Son|Son]], and in turn Jesus is the authoritative head over the church, not simply its source. By extension, they then conclude that in marriage and in the church, the man is the authoritative head over the woman.<ref>[http://www.biblicalstudies.org.uk/pdf/tj/kephale_grudem.pdf Wayne Grudem, "Does Kefale ("Head") Mean "Source" Or "Authority Over" in Greek Literature? A Survey of 2,336 Examples"] Trinity Journal ns 6.1 (Spring 1985): 38-59</ref>

Another potential way to define the word "head", and hence the relationship between husband and wife as found in the Bible, is through the example given in the surrounding context in which the word is found.<ref>{{Bibleverse|Eph.|5:20-33}}</ref> In that context the husband and wife are compared to Christ and his church. The context seems to imply an authority structure based on a man sacrificing himself for his wife, as Christ did for the church; a love-based authority structure, where submission is not required but freely given based on the care given to the wife.<ref>Wickstrom, Mark. ''The Gospel of Grace.'' Beaver Pond Press, 2008.{{ISBN|978-1-59298-232-5}}</ref>

Some biblical references on this subject are debated depending on one's school of theology. The [[Historical-grammatical method|historical grammatical method]] is a [[Biblical hermeneutics|hermeneutic]] technique that strives to uncover the meaning of the text by taking into account not just the grammatical words, but also the syntactical aspects, the cultural and historical background, and the literary genre. Thus references to a patriarchal Biblical culture may or may not be relevant to other societies. What is believed to be a timeless truth to one person or denomination may be considered a cultural norm or minor opinion to another.

=== {{anchor|Egalitarian view}} Egalitarian view ===
{{See also|Christian egalitarianism}}

Christian Egalitarians (from the French word "égal" meaning "equal") believe that Christian marriage is intended to be a marriage without any hierarchy—a full and equal partnership between the wife and husband. They emphasize that nowhere in the New Testament is there a requirement for a wife to ''obey'' her husband. While "obey" was introduced into marriage vows for much of the church during the Middle Ages, its only New Testament support is found in Peter 3, with that only being by implication from Sarah's obedience to Abraham.<ref name="Staggs"/>{{rp|p.190}} Scriptures such as [[Galatians 3:28]] state that in Christ, right relationships are restored and in him, "there is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female."<ref name=CBE>Christians for Biblical Equality. "Men, Women and Biblical Equality". Ltd. CBE on the Web at "Biblical Equality", 1989. [www.cbeinternational.org/?q=content/men-women-and-biblical-equality.] Accessed 5 Mar 2013</ref>

Christian Egalitarians interpret scripture to mean that God intended spouses to practice ''mutual submission'', each in equality with the other. The phrase "mutual submission" comes from a verse in Ephesians 5 which precedes advice for the three domestic relationships of the day, including slavery. It reads, "Submit to one another ('mutual submission') out of reverence for Christ", wives to husbands, children to parents, and slaves to their master. Christian Egalitarians believe that full partnership in marriage is the most biblical view, producing the most intimate, wholesome, and reciprocally fulfilling marriages.<ref>Spencer, Aída Besançon, William Spencer. ''Marriage at the Crossroads''. InterVarsity Press, 2009. {{ISBN|978-0-8308-2890-6}}</ref>

The Christian Egalitarian view<ref>Christian Egalitarian view as differentiated from humanistic egalitarianism</ref> of marriage asserts that gender, in and of itself, neither privileges nor curtails a believer's gifting or calling to any ministry in the church or home. It does not imply that [[women]] and [[men]] are identical or undifferentiated, but affirms that God designed men and women to complement and benefit one another.<ref name=Groothuis2>Groothuis, Rebecca Merrill. "The Bible and Gender Equality." [www.cbeinternational.org Christians for Biblical Equality Web site]</ref> A foundational belief of Christian Egalitarians is that the husband and wife are created equally and are ordained of God to "become one", a biblical principle first ordained by God in Genesis 2, reaffirmed by Jesus in Matthew 19 and Mark 10, and by the [[Apostle Paul]] in Ephesians 5. Therefore, they see that "oneness" as pointing to [[gender equality]] in marriage. They believe the biblical model for Christian marriages is therefore for the spouses to share equal responsibility within the family—not one over the other nor one under the other.

David Dykes, theologian, author, and pastor of a 15,000-member Baptist church, sermonized that "When you are in Christ, you have full equality with all other believers". In a sermon he entitled "The Ground Is Level at the Foot of the Cross", he said that some theologians have called one particular Bible verse the Christian ''[[Magna Carta]]''. The Bible verse reads: "There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus."<ref>{{Bibleverse|Galatians|3:28|NIV}}</ref> Acknowledging the differences between men and women, Dykes writes that "in Christ, these differences don't define who we are. The only category that really matters in the world is whether you are '''in Christ'''. At the cross, Jesus destroyed all the made-made{{Clarify|date=August 2018}} barriers of hostility:" ethnicity, social status, and gender.<ref>Dykes, David O. "[http://www.preaching.com/sermons/11682921/page-3/ The Ground Is Level at the Foot of the Cross]". (Senior Pastor of Green Acres Baptist Church in Tyler, Texas)</ref>

{{Blockquote|The Galatians 3 passage comes after the apostle Paul tells us he would not submit to what was "hypocritical" to the Gospel.<ref>{{Bibleverse|Gal.|2:1-14}}</ref> The apostle Peter had affirmed the truth of the Gospel regarding the Gentiles with his words, but his actions compromised it.<ref>[http://www.cbeinternational.org/?q=content/2013-02-28-preparing-womens-history-month-arise-e-newsletter Quient, Allison. "Arise" CBE newsletter, 28 Feb 2013] {{webarchive|url=https://web.archive.org/web/20130515014730/http://www.cbeinternational.org/?q=content%2F2013-02-28-preparing-womens-history-month-arise-e-newsletter |date=2013-05-15 }}</ref>}}

Those of the egalitarian persuasion point to the biblical instruction that all Christian believers, irrespective of gender, are to submit or be subject "to one another in the fear of God"<ref>{{Bibleverse|Eph.|5:21|KJV|Eph.&nbsp;5:21&nbsp;KJV}}</ref> or "out of reverence for Christ".<ref>{{Bibleverse|Eph.|5:21|NIV}}</ref> [[Gilbert Bilezikian]] writes that in the highly debated Ephesians&nbsp;5 passage, the verb "to be subject" or "to be submitted" appears in verse&nbsp;21 which he describes as serving as a "hinge" between two different sections. The first section consists of verses 18–20, verse 21 is the connection between the two, and the second section consists of verses 22–33.<ref name=Bilezikian>Bilezikian, Gilbert. ''Beyond Sex Roles.'' Baker Book House, 1989. {{ISBN|0-8010-0885-9}}</ref>{{rp|p.153}} When discussion begins at verse 22 in Ephesians&nbsp;5, Paul appears to be reaffirming a chain of command principle within the family. However,

{{Blockquote|...when interpretation begins with verse 21, the entire passage describes mutual submission within the family. The wife submits to her husband in everything "as unto the Lord." If her husband makes a request unworthy of her Lord, her primary loyalty is "unto the Lord." ...Instruction about submission is four times longer for husbands than for wives. The greatest burden of submission is clearly placed on the husband.<ref name=Prescott>Prescott, Bruce. "The Christian Family: Mutual Submission or Chain of Command?" ''Mainstream Messenger'', Vol. 1, No. 3. November 1998. Online: http://www.mainstreambaptists.org/mob2/family.htm</ref>}}

Advocates of [[Christian egalitarianism]] believe that this model has firm biblical support:
*The word translated "help" or "helper" in Genesis 2 until quite recently was generally understood to subordinate a wife to her husband. The KJV translates it as God saying, "I will make a help meet for him". The first distortion was extrabiblical: the noun "help" and the adjective "meet" traditionally have been combined into a new noun, "helpmate". Thus, wives were often referred to as her husband's "helpmate". Next, from the word "help" were drawn inferences of authority/subjection distinctions between men and women. "Helper" was taken to mean that husband was boss and wife his domestic. It is now realized that of the 21 times the Hebrew word 'ezer is used in the Old Testament, in eight of those instances the term clearly means "savior"—another word for Jehovah God. For example, Psalm 33 says "the Lord...is our help ('ezer) and shield". Psalm 121 reads "I lift up my eyes to the mountains—where does my help ('ezer) come from? My help ('ezer) comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth." That Hebrew word is not used in the Bible with reference to any subordinate person such a servant.<ref name=Bilezikian/>{{rp|p.28}} Thus, forms of 'ezer in the Hebrew Bible can mean either "to save" or "to be strong" or have the idea of power and strength.<ref>Freedman, R. David. ''Biblical Archaeology Review''. Jan/Feb 1983, pp. 56-58</ref>
*The "two becoming one" concept, first cited in Genesis 2, was quoted by Jesus in his teachings on marriage and recorded almost identically in the gospels of both Matthew and Mark.<ref>{{bibleverse|Matt.|19:4–6}} {{bibleverse|Mk.|10:7–9}}</ref> In those passages Jesus reemphasized the concept by adding a divine postscript to the Genesis passage: "So, they are no longer two, but one" (NIV).
*The Apostle Paul also quoted the Genesis 2:24 passage in Ephesians 5<ref name="Staggs"/> Describing it as a "profound mystery", he analogizes it to "Christ and the church".<ref>{{Bibleverse|Eph.|5:32}}</ref> Then Paul states that every husband must love his wife as he loves himself.<ref>{{Bibleverse|Eph.|5:33}}</ref>
*Jesus actually ''forbids'' any hierarchy of relationships in Christian relationships. All three [[synoptic gospels]] record virtually the same teaching of Jesus, adding to its apparent significance:<ref>Marsh, Clive, Steve Moyise. ''Jesus and the Gospels.'' Continuum International Publishing Group, 2006. {{ISBN|0-567-04073-9}}</ref><ref>{{bibleverse|Matt.|20:25–26||Matt.&nbsp;20:25–26a}} {{bibleverse|Mark|10:42-45}} {{bibleverse|Luke|22:25-27}}</ref>
*The [[Apostle Paul]] calls on husbands and wives to be subject ''to each other'' out of reverence for Christ—mutual submission.<ref>{{bibleverse|Eph.|5:21}}</ref>
*As persons, husband and wife are of equal value. There is no priority of one spouse over the other. In truth, they are one.<ref name="Staggs" /> Bible scholar [[Frank Stagg (theologian)|Frank Stagg]] and Classicist [[Evelyn Stagg]] write that husband-wife equality produces the most intimate, wholesome and mutually fulfilling marriages. They conclude that the Apostle Paul's statement, sometimes called the "Magna Carta of Humanity"<ref>Jewett, Paul K. ''Man as Male and Female: A Study in Sexual Relationships from a Theological Point of View.'' Eerdmans, 1990, p. 142. {{ISBN|978-0-8028-1597-2}}</ref> and recorded in Galatians 3, applies to all Christian relationships, including Christian marriage: "There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither bond nor free, there is ''neither male nor female'': for you are all ''one'' in Christ Jesus."
*The Apostle Peter calls husbands and wives "joint heirs of the grace of life" and cautions a husband who is not considerate to his wife and does not treat her with respect that his prayers will be hindered.<ref>{{Bibleverse|1Pet|3:7||1&nbsp;Peter&nbsp;3:7}}</ref>
*Each of the six times [[Aquila and Priscilla|Aquila and his wife Priscilla]] are mentioned by name in the New Testament, they are listed together. Their order of appearance alternates, with Aquila mentioned first in the first, third and fifth mentions, and Priscilla (Prisca) first in the other three.<ref>{{bibleverse||Acts|18:2|KJV}}, {{bibleverse-nb||Acts|18:18|KJV}}, {{bibleverse-nb||Acts|18:26|KJV}}, {{bibleverse||Romans|16:3|KJV}}, {{bibleverse|1|Corinthians|16:19|KJV}}, {{bibleverse|2|Timothy|4:19|KJV}} King James Version</ref> Some revisions of the Bible put Priscilla first, instead of Aquila, in Acts 18:26, following the Vulgate and a few Greek texts.<ref>{{cite web| url = http://studybible.info/compare/Acts%2018:26| title = Acts 18:26 multi-version}}</ref> Some scholars suggest that Priscilla was the head of the family unit.<ref>{{cite book
 | last = Achtenmeier
 | first = P.J.
 | title = HarperCollins Bible Dictionary
 | publisher = HarperCollins
 | volume = 36
 | edition = revised
 | year = 2007
 | orig-year = 1996   
 | page = 882
 | isbn = 978-0-06-060037-2
}}</ref>
*Among spouses, it is possible to submit without love, but it is impossible to love without submitting mutually to each other.<ref>{{Bibleverse|Col.|3:8-9}}</ref>

The egalitarian paradigm leaves it up to the couple to decide who is responsible for what task or function in the home. Such decisions should be made rationally and wisely,<ref>{{Bibleverse|Eph|5:15}}</ref> not based on gender or tradition. Examples of a couple's decision logic might include:
*which spouse is ''more competent'' for a particular task or function;
*which has ''better access'' to it;
*or if they decide both are similarly competent and have comparable access, they might make the decision based on who ''prefers'' that function or task, or conversely, which of them ''dislikes it less'' than the other. The egalitarian view holds that decisions about managing family responsibilities are made rationally through cooperation and negotiation, not on the basis of tradition (e.g., "man's work" or "woman's" work), nor any other irrelevant or irrational basis.<ref name="UMC">{{cite web
 | title = The Family
 | work =UMC Book of Discipline
 | publisher = United Methodist Church
 | year =2004
 | url =http://archives.umc.org/interior.asp?mid=1720
 | access-date =28 February 2012 }}</ref><ref>{{cite web
| title = Equal Marriage Rights for All
 | publisher =United Church of Christ
 | year = 2005
 | url =http://www.ucc.org/assets/pdfs/2005-equal-marriage-rights-for-all-1.pdf
 | access-date = 28 February 2011}}</ref>

=== Complementarian view ===
{{See also|Complementarianism}}

Complementarians hold to a hierarchical structure between husband and wife. They believe men and women have different gender-specific roles that allow each to ''complement'' the other, hence the designation "Complementarians". The Complementarian view of marriage holds that while the husband and wife are of equal worth before God, husbands and wives are given different functions and responsibilities by God that are based on gender, and that male leadership is biblically ordained so that the husband is always the senior authority figure. They state they "observe with deep concern" "accompanying distortions or neglect of the glad harmony portrayed in Scripture between the intelligent, humble leadership of redeemed husbands and the loving, willing support of that leadership by redeemed wives".<ref>[http://cbmw.org/core-beliefs/ Core Beliefs{{snd}} the "Danvers Statement"] {{webarchive|url=https://web.archive.org/web/20140626082957/http://cbmw.org/core-beliefs/ |date=2014-06-26 }}. [[Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood|CBMW]]. Retrieved on 17 July 2014.</ref> They believe "the Bible presents a clear chain of authority—above all authority and power is God; God is the head of Christ. Then in descending order, Christ is the head of man, man is the head of woman, and parents are the head of their children."<ref>"Authority in the Family". Online: [www.covenanttruth.com.au/html/study/f/f4.htm] Accessed 1 March 2013</ref> Complementarians teach that God intended men to lead their wives as "heads" of the family. [[Wayne Grudem]], in an article that interprets the "mutual submission" of Ephesians 5 as being hierarchical, writes that it means "being considerate of one another, and caring for one another’s needs, and being thoughtful of one another, and sacrificing for one another."<ref>Grudem, Wayne. "Submission as an Interpretation of Ephesians 5:21."{{cite web |url=http://goodshepherdinitiative.net/docs_pdf/cbmw-grudem-myth-mutual-submission.pdf |title=Archived copy |access-date=2013-02-15 |url-status=dead |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20141112212330/http://goodshepherdinitiative.net/docs_pdf/cbmw-grudem-myth-mutual-submission.pdf |archive-date=2014-11-12 }} Accessed 14 Feb 2013.</ref>

Scriptures such as 1 Corinthians 11:3: "But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God", (KJV) is understood as meaning the wife is to be subject to her husband, if not unconditionally.<ref>[http://www.galaxie.com/article/jbmw16-2-12 Meyer, Jason C.. ''Another Middle Way that Doesn’t Exist,''] (A Review of Jim and [[Sarah Sumner]], ''Just How Married Do You Want to Be?'') Accessed 13 March 2013 (subscription)</ref>

According to Complementarian authors [[John Piper (theologian)|John Piper]], [[Wayne Grudem]], and others, historically, but to a significantly lesser extent in most of Christianity today, the predominant position in both Catholicism and conservative Protestantism places the male as the "head" in the home and in the church.<ref>[https://books.google.com/books/about/Recovering_Biblical_Manhood_Womanhood.html?id=NHPxcYNV0BwC John Piper, Wayne Grudem, ''Recovering Biblical Manhood and Womanhood: A Response to Evangelical Feminism''], p. 165; Crossway, 2006</ref><ref>Mr. David Blankenhorn, (ed.), Mr. Don S. Browning (ed.), Mrs. Mary Stewart Van Leeuwen (ed.), ''Does Christianity Teach Male Headship?: The Equal-Regard Marriage and Its Critics,'' pp. 29-36</ref><ref>[http://biblehub.com/commentaries/1_corinthians/11-3.htm 1Cor. 11:3] [[Albert Barnes (theologian)|Albert Barnes]] Notes on the Bible; [[Adam Clarke]]'s Commentary on the Bible; [[John Gill (theologian)|John Gill]]'s Exposition of the Entire Bible; [[Matthew Henry]]’s Commentary on the Whole Bible accessed 17 July 2014</ref><ref>Ron Rhodes, [https://books.google.com/books/about/The_Complete_Guide_To_Christian_Denomina.html?id=ZOWNgDET8agCe ''The Complete Guide To Christian Denominations''], 2005</ref> They hold that women are commanded to be in subjection to male leadership, with a wife being obedient to her head (husband), based upon Old Testament precepts and principles.<ref>{{cite web |url=http://cbmw.org/uncategorized/summaries-of-the-egalitarian-and-complementarian-positions/ |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20131216235028/http://cbmw.org/uncategorized/summaries-of-the-egalitarian-and-complementarian-positions/ |title=Summaries of the Egalitarian and Complementarian Positions | author=Bruce A. Ware |date=26 June 2007 |archive-date=16 December 2013 | url-status=live | access-date=17 July 2014}}</ref> This view holds that, "God has created men and women equal in their essential dignity and human personhood, but different and complementary in function with male headship in the home and in the Church."<ref>{{cite web | last=Duncan | first=Ligon | title=Male Authority and Female Equality: In the beginning—Genesis 1-3 being understood as part of God's created design | publisher=Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood | date=2004-12-15 | url=http://www.cbmw.org/Resources/Sermons/Male-Authority-and-Female-Equality-In-the-beginning-Genesis-1-3 | access-date=2012-02-27}}</ref>

Grudem also acknowledges exceptions to the submission of wives to husbands where moral issues are involved.<ref>[http://bible.org/seriespage/wives-sarah-and-husbands-who-honor-them-1-peter-31-7 Wives Like Sarah, and the Husbands Who Honor Them 1 Peter 3:1-7].</ref> Rather than unconditional obedience, Complementarian authors such as Piper and Grudem are careful to caution that a wife's submission should never cause her to "follow her husband into sin."<ref>Piper, John and Grudem, Wayne (eds.) ''[[Recovering Biblical Manhood and Womanhood]]: A Response to Evangelical Feminism.'' Wheaton, IL: Crossway Books, 1991, p. 57</ref>

[[Roman Catholic Church]] teaching on the role of women includes that of Pope Leo XIII in his 1880 encyclical ''Arcanum'' which states:
{{Blockquote|The husband is the chief of the family and the head of the wife. The woman, because she is flesh of his flesh, and bone of his bone, must be subject to her husband and obey him; not, indeed, as a servant, but as a companion, so that her obedience shall be wanting in neither honor nor dignity. Since the husband represents Christ, and since the wife represents the Church, let there always be, both in him who commands and in her who obeys, a heaven-born love guiding both in their respective duties."<ref>Pope Leo XIII Encyclical 1880 Arcanum {{cite web |url=https://www.vatican.va/holy_father/leo_xiii/encyclicals/documents/hf_l-xiii_enc_10021880_arcanum_en.html |title=Arcanum Divinae (February 10, 1880) &#124; LEO XIII |access-date=2009-05-30 |url-status=dead |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20090622095840/https://www.vatican.va/holy_father/leo_xiii/encyclicals/documents/hf_l-xiii_enc_10021880_arcanum_en.html |archive-date=2009-06-22 }} 1880 Arcanum</ref> This position was affirmed in the 1930 encyclical ''Casti Connubii,'' which invokes Ephesians 5:22, "Let women be subject to their husbands as to the Lord, because the husband is the head of the wife, and Christ is the head of the Church.<ref>{{cite web| url = https://www.vatican.va/holy_father/pius_xi/encyclicals/documents/hf_p-xi_enc_31121930_casti-connubii_en.html,| title = Pope Pius XI, Casti Connubii}}</ref>}}

Though each of their churches is autonomous and self-governed, the official position of the [[Southern Baptist Convention]] (the largest Protestant denomination in the United States) is:
{{Blockquote|The husband and wife are of equal worth before God, since both are created in God's image. A husband is to love his wife as Christ loved the church. He has the God-given responsibility to provide for, to protect, and to lead his family. A wife is to submit herself graciously to the servant leadership of her husband even as the church willingly submits to the headship of Christ. She, being in the image of God as is her husband and thus equal to him, has the God-given responsibility to respect her husband and to serve as his helper in managing the household and nurturing the next generation."<ref>[http://www.sbc.net/aboutus/basicbeliefs.asp Southern Baptist Convention, Basic Beliefs] {{Webarchive|url=https://web.archive.org/web/20130312082918/http://www.sbc.net/aboutus/basicbeliefs.asp |date=2013-03-12 }} 2013</ref>}}

===Biblical patriarchy===
{{see also|Biblical patriarchy|Pater familias}}

The patriarchal model of marriage is clearly the oldest one.{{According to whom|date=September 2019}} It characterized the theological understanding of most Old Testament writers. It mandates the supremacy, at times the ultimate domination, of the husband-father in the family. In the first century Roman Empire, in the time of Jesus, Paul, and Peter, it was the law of the land and gave the husband absolute authority over his wife, children, and slaves—even the power of life or death. It subordinates all women.

Biblical patriarchy is similar to [[Complementarianism]] but with differences of degree and emphasis. Biblical patriarchists carry the husband-headship model considerably further and with more militancy. While Complementarians also hold to exclusively male leadership in both the home and the church, Biblical patriarchy extends that exclusion to the civic sphere as well, so that women should not be civil leaders<ref>[http://www.visionforumministries.org/issues/ballot_box/should_christians_support_a_wo.aspx Should Christians Support a Woman for the Office of Civil Magistrate?].</ref> and indeed should not have careers outside the home.<ref>[http://www.visionforumministries.org/issues/family/called_to_the_home_called_to_r.aspx Called to the Home — Called to Rule].</ref>

Patriarchy is based on authoritarianism—complete obedience or subjection to male authority as opposed to individual freedom. Patriarchy gives preeminence to the male in essentially all matters of religion and culture. It explicitly deprives all women of social, political, and economic rights. The marriage relationship simply reinforced this dominance of women by men, providing religious, cultural, and legal structures that clearly favor patriarchy to the exclusion of even basic human dignity for wives.<ref name=Patriarchy/><ref>"Are "The Tenets of Biblical Patriarchy" Biblical? Part 1". {{cite web |url=http://rethinkingvisionforum.org/2011/08/11/are-%E2%80%9Cthe-biblical-tenets-of-patriarchy%E2%80%9D-biblical-part-1/ |title=Are "The Tenets of Biblical Patriarchy" Biblical? Part 1 &#124; Rethinking Vision Forum |access-date=2015-03-17 |url-status=dead |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20150402114657/http://rethinkingvisionforum.org/2011/08/11/are-%E2%80%9Cthe-biblical-tenets-of-patriarchy%E2%80%9D-biblical-part-1/ |archive-date=2015-04-02 }} 16 Mar 2015</ref>

Historically in classical patriarchy, the wives and children were always legally dependent upon the father, as were the slaves and other servants. It was the way of life throughout most of the Old Testament, religiously, legally, and culturally. However, it was not unique to Hebrew thought. With only minor variations, it characterized virtually every pagan culture of that day—including all Pre-Christian doctrine and practice.<ref name=Patriarchy/>

While Scripture allowed this approach in Old Testament times, nowhere does the Bible ordain it. In the Hebrew nation, patriarchy seems to have evolved as an expression of male dominance and supremacy, and of a double standard that prevailed throughout much of the Old Testament. Its contemporary advocates insist that it is the only biblically valid model for marriage today. They argue that it was established at Creation, and thus is a firm, unalterable decree of God about the relative positions of men and women.<ref name=EB>{{Cite web | url=https://www.britannica.com/EBchecked/topic/446579/patria-potestas | title=Patria potestas &#124; Roman law}}</ref>

Biblical patriarchists see what they describe as a crisis of this era being what they term to be a systematic attack on the "timeless truths of biblical patriarchy". They believe such an attack includes the movement to "subvert the biblical model of the family, and redefine the very meaning of fatherhood and motherhood, masculinity, femininity, and the parent and child relationship."<ref name=Patriarchy/> Arguing from the biblical presentation of God revealing himself "as masculine, not feminine", they believe God ordained distinct gender roles for man and woman as part of the created order. They say "Adam’s headship over Eve was established at the beginning, before sin entered the world". Their view is that the male has God-given authority and mandate to direct "his" household in paths of obedience to God. They refer to man's "dominion" beginning within the home, and a man's qualification to lead and ability to lead well in the public square is based upon his prior success in ''ruling his household''.<ref name=Patriarchy/>

Thus, William Einwechter refers to the traditional Complementarian view as "two-point Complementarianism" (male leadership in the family and church), and regards the biblical patriarchy view as "three-point" or "full" complementarianism (male leadership in family, church ''and society'').<ref>{{cite web| url = http://www.visionforumministries.org/issues/family/men_and_women_and_the_creation.aspx| title = Men and Women and the Creation Order, Part 1 - Vision Forum Ministries}}</ref>

The patriarchists teach that "the woman was created as a helper to her husband, as the bearer of children, and as a "keeper at home", concluding that the God-ordained and proper sphere of dominion for a wife is the household. Biblical patriarchists consider that "faithfulness to Christ requires that (Biblical patriarchy) be believed, taught, and lived". They claim that the "man is...the image and glory of God in terms of authority, while the woman is the glory of man". They teach that a wife is to be ''obedient'' to her "head" (husband), based upon [[Old Testament]] teachings and models.

=== Other views ===

See [[Christian feminism]]